WHEN I DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH COMPLEX GEOMETRIES

This outfit is very unlike me. But to be fair, when I wore it I was feeling very unlike me and I just wanted something simple and loose fitting. That was the plan...it turned out to be a very uncomfortable ensemble that lasted no more than a few hours. 

I've been hearing bloggers rave about Complex Geometries for a couple of years now, so when The Outnet had a sale I bought this t shirt so I could try the label out. I can't say I'm sold. I've always found that because I'm not a skinny girl elaborately constructed clothes tend to look weird on me - folds, layers and sharp cuts look great on a flat surface - but when you add boobs and such to the mix the essence of the garment suddenly disappears. Am I the only person that finds this to be the case?

Anyhow, let's get to the specifics...the problem with this Complex Geometries top is that the 'clever' construction makes it annoying to wear. The off set arm holes, meant to aid the artistic gathering of material, in reality just restrict your arm movements and make you feel like you're wearing a straight jacket. I can't help but think that there's a reason for the common design elements we embrace today and why all t shirts, jeans and dresses follow a basic pattern, because y'know, we all have a head, arms and legs in pretty much the same place and want to be able to move them. 

Needless to say, this top will be going to a charity shop near me very soon. 

Top - Complex Geometries 

Belt - Primark 

Leggings - Sass & Bide

Shoes - Sigerson Morrison 

My Fantasy Beach Break

London is a sweltering pseudo sauna at the moment. City living and temperatures above 30 degrees really don't work for me. The tube becomes an even more effective torture device than before and shops begin to resemble Native American sweat lodges (I'm talking about you, Topshop Oxford Circus...half the city's female population spend their cash there and you STILL can't have a decent air con system?).

My point is that I want to be on a beach. I don't care if it's the Gower in Wales, Margate, somewhere more chic like St Tropez, or bordering on the exotic. I just need fresh sea air, a chance to swim and some sand that will stubbornly stick to every item of clothing and baggage to remind me of a great summer escape. 

Of course, wherever I go I will be channeling this great editorial in Vogue Paris from July 2007. It's styled by Emmanuelle Alt and photographed by Peter Lindbergh. 

Pet Fashion Hates

On the whole I love fashion. I like the process of dressing up, becoming a character, or at least imbuing yourself with new qualities thanks to a garment or accessories. It's fun. But there are elements that I really dislike...

1) The One-Up-Man-Ship - we've all experienced it, the way women will give one another the glance up and down, assessing outfits, competing to be 'better', whatever 'better' is (thinner, richer, chicer, grungier etc). I especially hate this at fashion events, I really don't know how people in the business deal with it.

2) The Cost - I can understand why some pieces cost the earth, they are literally works of art. But when jeans are priced at £250 I have a hard time swallowing it. I remember once standing in the changing rooms of Barney's trying on very expensive denims when I realised that the fit of my £10 Primark ones were better, and they felt nicer. Even when I subscribed to the glory days of expensive jeans I would still only buy them from T.K.Maxx six months down the line. Now I wear only Uniqlo and Topshop jeans.

3) One shouldered anythings - I don't know why, it makes me feel a bit queasy aesthetically.

4) The Exclusivity - you walk into a shop. The assistants glare at you. Or worse still, ignore you. You are not their kind of customer. When this happens (and boy does it happen, especially in Chanel in my younger days) I walk the f**k out and make a point of blowing my money somewhere else.

Phew. Grumpy today.