The Human Zebra - Sass & Bide Stripe Trousers

When I was in Australia I was most taken with these Sass & Bide Vie trousers. They reminded me of dodgy 1980's graphic muscle man pants, the kind that you see on men of a certain age in places that time forgot. I've always had a perverse love of this style of trouser - comfy, eye catching and if not flattering then at least not harem poo pant bad (not all harem pants are bad, it's just the ones that have the crotch at knee height that make me thing there's a poo in there somewhere, childish, I know). 

Anyway, yesterday I came across a clashing black and white stripe tee and I immediately thought of these trousers. Together they are slouch heaven. 

Top - H&M 

Trousers - Sass & Bide Vie 

Shoes - Bloch 

Smoking Sucks

My brother is about to give up smoking!!!!! 


Tomorrow his wife will lock him in their apartment whilst she goes off to work at Fashion Week in Australia and he will have a week without fags to try and go cold turkey before being let out once again into the real world. 


YOU CAN DO IT KIDDO. 


P.S.  Please note the similarity to Trainspotting. I have seen the state of his toilet sometimes, it might not be that different...

Pet Fashion Hates

On the whole I love fashion. I like the process of dressing up, becoming a character, or at least imbuing yourself with new qualities thanks to a garment or accessories. It's fun. But there are elements that I really dislike...

1) The One-Up-Man-Ship - we've all experienced it, the way women will give one another the glance up and down, assessing outfits, competing to be 'better', whatever 'better' is (thinner, richer, chicer, grungier etc). I especially hate this at fashion events, I really don't know how people in the business deal with it.

2) The Cost - I can understand why some pieces cost the earth, they are literally works of art. But when jeans are priced at £250 I have a hard time swallowing it. I remember once standing in the changing rooms of Barney's trying on very expensive denims when I realised that the fit of my £10 Primark ones were better, and they felt nicer. Even when I subscribed to the glory days of expensive jeans I would still only buy them from T.K.Maxx six months down the line. Now I wear only Uniqlo and Topshop jeans.

3) One shouldered anythings - I don't know why, it makes me feel a bit queasy aesthetically.

4) The Exclusivity - you walk into a shop. The assistants glare at you. Or worse still, ignore you. You are not their kind of customer. When this happens (and boy does it happen, especially in Chanel in my younger days) I walk the f**k out and make a point of blowing my money somewhere else.

Phew. Grumpy today.

Fantasy Shoe Of The Week - Tabitha Simmons

As always, I have bought far too many shoes in the last 7 days (LA Gears & some dusky blue men's brogues from T.K. Maxx and crazy tasselled wedges from Zara). Still, this does not stop me wanting more. Tabitha Simmons' shoes are always gorgeous - but my, are they on the pricey end of town. I would totally buy them if I were married to Bill Gates or Oprah (basically someone rich enough to not notice that these snakeskin works of art cost £1,300!)

Still, if you are Stedman or Melinda and you want to buy these (for yourself or perhaps moi) then Net A Porter is the place to go.

Why Don't You...Customise Your Boots?

Walking along Gertrude Street in Fitzroy, Melbourne, last month I spied these shoes in the window of a vintage shop. 


I think it's a great idea - cutting and turning over old cowboy boots and wrapping mismatched belts around them...I will be taking this as inspiration for old boring boots (perhaps without the cutting - me + leather + craft knives = hospital, usually) very soon. 

L.A. Gear - the 80's in trainer form

As a child of about 10 the coolest damn trainers IN THE WORLD were L.A. Gear. The late 80's saw the beginning of the trainer craze - when things like Reebok Pumps, Nike Airs and BK Knights were being designed to convince a youth market these items could make you instantly cooler. Basically the more detail you shoved on a trainer the better, and if you couldn't, heck put it on the tag. Mum's tutted that you couldn't buy them in Clarks, and the worst fate was to be sent to school in Dunlop Green Flash (or worse still, black elastic gym shoes from Woolies). 


I can remember memorising the different colourways of L.A. Gear trainers in my Grandma's catalogues where you could get payment plans to pay for them over months (only £1.99 for 48 months! etc). Then one miraculous day I think we found them on sale or perhaps on offer in a non descript sports shop just off the Strand in London. I got a pair (and my friend Simi did too) and we spent hours lacing them as was the fashion with a chequerboard-esque design. 


So, when I walked into Newcastle T.K. Maxx on Tuesday and saw a reissue in my size it was a done deal. Twenty quid to relive my childhood! When I put them on I immediately think of bourbon biscuits, Saved By The Bell, Salt N Pepa and Timmy Mallet. Oh the glory days. 

The Summer Shoe - 2008 Manolo Blahnik...Heaven

I now own the Manolo Blahnik Marimekko print shoes from Spring / Summer 2008! 


Found today in a second hand designer shop for only £60. I am hobbling around the house in them, because ohmygod, they are high.